


Bad Day

by Rakshi



Category: Lord of the Rings RPF
Genre: Early Work, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-06-20
Updated: 2013-06-20
Packaged: 2017-12-15 13:30:29
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,372
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/850083
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Rakshi/pseuds/Rakshi
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>While shooting the movie Sean and Elijah have a very bad day.  A VERY early work. A bit of hurt/comfort here.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Bad Day

Elijah was exhausted. Today's scenes had been emotionally draining and tomorrow looked to be more of the same. He'd been waiting for someone to help him get his wig off for ten minutes now, and he was tired and pissed. He pulled his wig off himself, ignoring the glue pulling on his skin.

"Hey!" he yelled. "I'm leaving this here." He tossed the wig onto a table and walked out.

The New Zealand night closed around him, cool and soothing. He liked the sound his shoes made on ground as he walked toward his car. Then he noticed something odd.

"Sean's car is still here." He thought, surprised. "I thought he left awhile ago."

He peered into the window. He saw Sean's books on the front seat and some bottles of water in the back seat. Looking around, Elijah saw no sign of life anywhere.

"Where could he be?" Elijah wondered.

He dashed back into the makeup area and yelled into the tent. "Hey! Anybody seen Astin?"

"Yeah." Someone responded. "He was walking down by the trees a minute ago."

Elijah headed in that direction, starting to feel worried. This kind of behavior wasn't like Sean and Elijah knew today's shoot had been hard on him too.

"God." He said aloud. "I want to find him!"

Elijah walked quietly along the tree line, heading toward a small clearing. He was hoping he wouldn't have to go into the woods to hunt for Sean, but was determined to find him even if that's what it took.

He heard a choked sound and stopped dead in his tracks. It was coming from the clearing. Elijah tried to get there as fast as he could without tripping in the dark. Then he spotted him.

Sean was sitting under a small group of trees. He was hugging his knees with his arms and his head was down. It looked as though he was crying.

Elijah ran to him and dropped down beside him. 'Sean!' He cried, pulling on his arm. "Are you OK? I've been looking for you."

Sean didn't move. Didn't speak. Didn't raise his head. His breathing was a ragged sigh. 

Elijah took his hand. He felt as though his heart would break if he couldn't get Sean to look at him. Speak to him.

"Sean." He said softly. "Won't you talk to me? Please?"

Sean shook his head, then lifted it a bit.

"Lijah." His voice was harsh and terribly sad. "Please go back to camp. I'm alright. Just leave me alone for awhile."

"No." Elijah said. "I won't leave you alone. Would you leave ME alone if I felt like this?"

Sean tried to pull his hand out of Elijah's grasp, but Elijah refused to let him go. "No." he said stubbornly. "I won't let you go either."

Sean looked up at him. His eyes were wet and it was obviously that he'd been crying.

"This isn't helping, Lijah." Sean said slowly. "This just makes it harder on me."

Elijah knew exactly what Sean was talking about. But this time he wasn't going to give in.

"I was there today too." Elijah told him, feeling his own breathing go a bit unsteady. "I know what you're feeling. I'm feeling the same thing.'

Releasing his hand, he knelt down and put both hands on Sean's shoulders, half embracing him.

"Please don't shut me out." Elijah said softly. "Please don't push me away. I need you, Sean."

Sean's head dropped again, but this time his forehead rested on one of Elijah's arms.

"I don't know if I'm going to make it." Sean said in that same shaking voice. "I don't know if I'm going to survive this."

"I know the scenes are hard . . ." Elijah began.

Sean raised his head. "It's not just the movie, Elijah, and you know it!" he said in a hoarse whisper.

Elijah was silent for a long time. How can I do this? He thought in despair. I love him more than I've ever loved anything. But all I do is bring him pain.

"I'm sorry, Sean." He said in a voice aching with tears. "I want so much to be good for you. But . . . but I'm not. I'm bad for you."

Elijah felt his eyes burn with tears. Oh great! He thought. I should be comforting him, and instead I'm doing this!

Elijah felt himself starting to cry. The events of the day, combined with his pain over Sean was too much for his heart to bear. He started to stand up. I'll just leave him alone. He thought in anguish. I can, at least, do that for him.

But Sean caught his hand and pulled him back down. In the next moment, Sean dragged them both down onto the soft grass and pulled Elijah close to him.

Elijah took a deep breath. He could feel the whole length of Sean's body against his own, and nothing could have ever prepared him for how wonderful Sean felt. He tried to hold back his tears, but felt Sean's shoulders shaking and melted into sobs, clinging to him.

For a long time they cried onto each other's shoulders. Speechless. Breathless. Knowing they could only truly find comfort in each other.

After awhile Elijah head Sean murmuring to him. "Shh. Baby. It's OK now."

Elijah raised his head and looked into Sean's eyes, reaching up to stroke his hair softly. Then his hand dropped to Sean's cheek. Sean leaned into his touch for the briefest of moments, and Elijah breathed his name, yearning for a kiss.

But Sean pulled Elijah's hand down.

"Baby." He whispered. "Lijah. Please."

He pulled Elijah close to him again, settling his head on Sean's shoulder.

"I know what I can take and what I can't take." Sean said in a voice still shaking with unshed tears. "Just stay here close to me like this. OK?"

Elijah nodded. "I'm grateful to be this close to you."

He heard Sean's breath catch.

"Give me what you can give me." Elijah said against his shoulder, fighting back more tears.

Sean nodded.

"Sam. Sam." Elijah sobbed, clinging to him. "I love you. I love you so much."

Sean sucked in a quick breath and pulled Elijah even closer to him.

"Frodo. My Frodo." He said, crying. "I love you too. More than you could ever imagine."

"Oh I don't know," Elijah whispered against his shoulder. "I can imagine quite a lot."

They lay like that for a very long time, saying nothing. Sean looked up at the New Zealand stars and rocked Elijah gently in his arms. He knew that no one else on Earth could have understood how he felt on this night. He knew that no one else on Earth could have given him healing and comfort. Only Elijah. As hard as this physical contact with him was on Sean, he was so glad it happened. So glad Elijah had come looking for him.

After awhile Sean stirred. "We need to go back, baby. I have to go home."

Elijah visibly winced and Sean, seeing it, reached out to caress his cheek. "I don't know what I would have done without you tonight."

"Or I without you." Elijah whispered.

Sean stood up and held out his hand to Elijah.

Elijah took it and was instantly pulled to his feet. Sean's arm dropped around his shoulders and he turned to begin walking back to camp. Elijah wound both arms around Sean's waist, determined to hang on to him as long as he could.

"You're the only person I know," Sean said, half-laughing, "who can snuggle while he's walking."

"You're worth the effort." Elijah told him.

They were quickly at the cars. Too quickly for Elijah. He leaned against his own car and watched as Sean opened his door. He stuffed his hands in his pockets and stared at the ground, determined not to cry again. He felt Sean's hand touch his face, tipping it up, and for a fleeting moment Sean's lips brushed against his.

Elijah never opened his eyes. He listened to Sean's car door slam shut and heard him drive away.

Finally Elijah opened his eyes, got into his own car, and drove away in the opposite direction.


End file.
